I spent two weeks in France in August, just before what the French call “la rentrée”. This directly translates to “the entrance”. What it really means is the beginning of the new season after a long period of slowing down, nourishing, exploring, laughing, resting - whatever it is that fills your cup. As much as all of this is important and the definition of self-care, that’s not what this article is about.
La rentrée is a symbol of the first day, something new, a path that’s unpaved, filled with uncertainty, excitement, and all the feels.
For the first time in my adult life, the first day jitters had my full attention over the last 2 weeks.
My niece and nephew started school at the beginning of September and although my nephew was attending the same school, he was nervous because this year he would be making all new friends. My niece, joining his school for her first year, was as excited as she was to join her big brother. When her mom and dad dropped her off, all of that excitement was masked with nerves, fear and more. My sister-in-law sent us photos in our group chat where everyone is smiling and then updated us shortly after on how the littles reacted to them getting into the elevator and leaving them there for the day - as you likely guessed - it wasn’t all smiles and laughter - quite the opposite.
As I was processing how the littles must feel, I turned the lens towards myself and realized that I too was feeling all the jitters around “la rentrée” of the fall semester. And then I continued to explore memories of my past to remember other times in my life that these same emotions and feels came up - they all led me back to my first day at a new job or a new team member’s first day.
My “aha” moment arrived - we ALL get the first day jitters. It's unavoidable.
As my mother reminds me all the time - “humans don’t like change” - and the first day means we are stepping into the gray space, the unknown while trusting that we are paving the path forward. That’s intimidating and scary, no matter if you are two and half years old, in your 30s, or in your 70s. It’s always going to feel scary and new. The good news, we can create and provide resources to ourselves and our teams to help soften the first day nerves.
I’ll start with you - after all, I define hospitality as showing up for yourself first so you can show up for others.
1- Name the feeling - admit to yourself that you are nervous about your first day. Call a friend or family member if that’s helpful and let them know you have the jitters. Allow them to be your cheerleader and remind you how skilled and great you are!
2- Wear or bring something with you that brings you back to center. Something that exudes confidence from within. How you dress is key to helping you feel great on your first day (and always!). Maybe there’s a pen, a watch, a bracelet, a ring, any item that you can have on you or in a pocket so those moments that you need to tap into your own courage and light, you can make contact with it to remind yourself that you got this!
3- Come prepared - What do you need to get all your documents completed, do you have enough snacks on you, do you have a water bottle? Pack a notebook and a pen. It’s better to be over prepared for your first day rather. Nothing can feel worse than not having the tools you need to feel successful - no need to try to look like the “cool kid”.
4 - Ask questions. This is your first day and so much information will be presented to you. You will also meet a lot of new people. Stay curious, ask questions if you need clarification.
How to support a new team member on their first day.
Humans need structure and support. We need the information handed and explained to us in order to process it and feel comfortable asking questions.
1 - Send a detailed schedule for their weekly training between 3-5 days prior to their first day. In this email, set the expectations of what they will learn on that first day. Detail out what they need to bring with them on their first day.
2 - Send all training materials 5 days prior to their first day of training. Be clear in what they will be expected to know on the first day. This allows for them to study on their own time, get acquainted with the business so not everything will be new to them in those first few hours. This also gives them the opportunity to formulate questions and be curious on day 1!
3 - Give a tour and introduce them to the team. Show new hires all of the facilities and where they can find what they need. Introduce them to their colleagues, leaders, and anyone that crosses your path along the day that they may interact with. They should feel welcomed by all!
4 - Recap at the end of the day. Have a `1:1 touch base with the team member(s) before they go home for the day. Save space for them to ask any questions and then review what they learnt today and what to expect their day to look like for day 2 of training. Set them up for success by clearly communicating the expectations.
It’s key to get the structures in place so you too can feel confident as the leader to welcome someone to the team. You are just as nervous for their first day as they may be. Let’s not forget that either!
No matter if you are a parent, you’re starting your first day somewhere or you’re the leader / teacher that is welcoming someone on their first day - remember we all get the jitters and these tools can help you soften them.
Love the phrase and all that it connotes. I always bring snacks that travel well - because sometimes I simply need a granola bar and a deep breath to quiet those jitters. 😊